Flash Fiction

Flash Fiction: Disappointed


Fiction under 250 words.


“God help me,” I muttered under my breath. I was behind “Eeyore” mom and we were traveling at a maximum of 20 miles per hour.

I glared at the navy blue Chevy Tahoe and tried to keep my cool in front of the boys. I didn’t know this woman, but I hated her. She was the slowest driver in the entire city and I was always the lucky dipstick that got stuck behind her.


The boys began squirming in their seats. They knew whenever we got behind the truck with the Eeyore decal that there would be trouble. We were slowing down (which only required a tap or two on the brakes considering we were moving at a snail’s pace) at a stoplight.

We were in the left-hand turn lane and there wasn’t a car to be seen for miles. The light was green and yet we continued to sit there.

I could feel a hot bubble of impatience making it’s way up my throat. I gritted my teeth and tried hard to keep my cool. Only, I couldn’t. A force, bigger than myself, took over and I gripped the steering wheel so hard I heard a knuckle crack.

I glared at the woman hoping she would catch my death-ray look in her rear-view mirror and get the hint.

No such luck.

We continued to sit through the green light. I tensed and before I could stop myself, I called her an ugly name. We were all disappointed.


Thanksgiving is SO Over

Are you ready for this … ?

I’m thankful Thanksgiving is over.

There. I said it.

I know! Where is my attitude of gratitude??

Actually, I AM grateful for everything, please don’t think that I’m not. But I have a hard time summoning the gratitude attitude when I have to host Thanksgiving dinner.

This hostess with the mostess gets stressed out!

We had everything under control (for the most part) though. Kevin put the turkey into the oven at 11:00 p.m. Friday night (did I mention we had to have our Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday?) and it cooked until 6:00 a.m. the next morning. We have a thermometer that plugs into our oven that is programmed to shut the oven off once the turkey reaches the desired temperature. Which is nice, because we were able to sleep without worrying about the turkey over cooking.

Kevin then carved the turkey and we had it ready to go by 8:00 a.m. We stuck the turkey in our warming drawer, I woke the boys up, straightened the house while they showered and Kevin and I still had time to sit for about thirty minutes and catch our breath while listening to Christmas music.

Our guests were scheduled to arrive at noon. At 11:00 a.m., we heard what sounded like someone walking on the roof – it was because someone WAS walking on the roof. The roof guy just showed up prepared to tweak the roof. We didn’t say anything at first, but when I saw him go to his truck, pull out a tool belt and start gathering equipment, I asked Kevin to tell him that now wasn’t a good time.

We were expecting 15 people in little less than an hour, after all. (Can you imagine being in the middle of the Thanksgiving prayer and trying to thank God for our abundance while competing with mind-numbing hammering? Exactly).

Everyone arrived at noon, we ate, talked …


had pie …


and me, my brother-in-law, my nephew, and Dude played the Settler’s of Catan game …

Longest Catan Game Ever

which lasted three LONG hours …


seriously, THREE HOURS.

It was like the longest Settler’s of Catan game EVER. (Actually, we played the Cities and Knights expansion pack which added to the difficulty level and of course, extended the game).

By the way, I came in last place. My nephew won, Dude came in second and my brother-in-law third.

Everyone stuck around until about 7:00 p.m. and when they left, I ate more pie and collapsed into a coma.

I think I’m still trying to recover.

Kevin LOVES hosting Thanksgiving. Me? Not so much. And it’s not because I don’t like having people over, oh contrare, but rather, it’s A LOT of work. Of course, a lot of that work is self-imposed, meaning that we don’t have to do nearly as much as we do whenever it’s our turn to host the dinner, but it’s fun to use Thanksgiving as our goal to work toward because most of these home improvements would still just be talked about instead of actually done if not for our self-imposed deadline.

I’m quite sure that made sense.

At any rate, we’re DONE with Thanksgiving and we won’t have to host dinner again until 2013.

This kid? Will have graduated from high school by then.


THAT doesn’t blow my mind at all.