paralegal

Class is in Session

Guess what started yesterday?

I signed onto the online classroom and got my first assignment.

Holy cow, there’s a lot of reading already! Which shouldn’t surprise me, I suppose, considering there are four textbooks for this class.

I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I think I was sort of thinking the first class would be a “hello! Introduce yourself” sort of class. Instead, we’re not only sprinting out of the starting gate right off the bat, the class is already half way around the track and here I am, just now arriving with my gym bag and still in my work clothes.

I didn’t get a chance to sign onto the classroom (I’m taking an online class through a vocational college, in case you’re just tuning in), until late last night and I was surprised to see several people had already completed the first assignment!

Don’t you hate overachievers? 😀

I feel woefully behind already, (I mentioned the class started yesterday, right??), and sort of in over my head. Though I read a bit last night, I was really too tired to retain a lot of it, the little that did sink in is, well, DETAILED! I mean, my reading comprehension is pretty decent, but holy brain overload, Batman, this is going to require a BIT more time than I had first thought.

Which is fine, I’m determined to see this new career choice to the end, but I’m going to have to do some major mental adjustments here.

Here’s the gist of what I’m studying right now:

The Evolution of the American Legal System

Welcome to the first lesson of the first course of the Paralegal Certificate Course. You should find this course to be enjoyable, challenging, and rewarding, as have thousands of students who have studied our curriculum since 1980. In this first lesson, you will learn about the foundations of our nation’s legal system. Your understanding of the derivations of our legal system is essential to your understanding of how our legal system works.

We will first consider how our legal system evolved, and you will understand the difference between a natural view of law and a secular view. You will understand why precedence is so important to our court system, and you will learn the structure of the American judicial system.

This is followed by four more online pages, as well as two sections out of chapter 6 from the book you see above AND suggested readings.

¡Ay, caramba!

Like I said, I’m up to the challenge, but I’m most likely going to have to make trips to the library just so I can get out of my comfort zone (i.e. house) and away from distractions (i.e. the Internet).

My next class is tomorrow, where more reading will be dumped upon me.

I’m not complaining, I’m really not, I’m just surprised that we’re setting the pace this early. But I’ll catch up and I’ll conquer this challenge because that’s what I do.

(And I have to prove to Kevin that this is not a waste of time and money. There’s that).

Thursday Thirteen

Thursday Thirteen – I Love Cupcakes (Part One)

Anyone else watch Cupcake Wars? I really dig watching the Food Networks’ food challenges and the cupcake wars are just … well, they’re cute.

Anyhoo … I thought it would be fun to highlight the Cupcakes from the Family Fun site in case anyone out there is hankering to decorate any cupcakes any time soon.

And if you need anyone to test those cupcakes for you, just let me know. 😀

1. A is for Apple Cupcake

2. B is for Baseball Cupcake(video)

3. C is For Clown Cupcake

4. D is for Desert Island Cupcake

5. E is For Elephant Cupcake

6. F is For Flower Cupcake

7. G Is for Grapes Cupcake

8. H Is for Hedgehog Cupcake

9. I is For Ice-Cream Cone Cupcake

10. J is For Jell-O Cupcake

11. K is For Kitty Cupcake

12. L is For Ladybug Cupcake

13. M is for Mini Monster Cupcake(video)

Which cupcake is your favorite?

random stuff

Do You Know an Amazing Woman?

How can you NOT like flash mobs? They’re like a real-life Glee episode.

I would totally participate in a flash mob. I would. I think it’s an incredibly positive and uplifting social experiment. Just look at the faces of the other shoppers as they watch – they’re delighted and overjoyed by something so touching.

At any rate, I hope this brought a smile to your face today. (I actually finished the video with tears in my eyes). And tell me readers, do you know an amazing woman?

Tell me about her in the comment section.

Flash Fiction

Flash Fiction: The Other Woman

writing prompt: Revenge

I hugged her.

What I wanted to do was strangle her. How could this woman act so fake? How could she pretend like nothing was wrong?

I noticed the gleam in her eyes. I noticed the way her lips curved into a self-satisfied smirk. She knew. And she was playing a game with me.

Fine. I’d play along. I’d show her that her little affair with my husband was not going to destroy me.

“Hey Candace! You’re looking good!”

Damn straight I look good, I thought to myself. I suppose she had assumed I would crawl into a dark hole and feel sorry for myself after I found out about them. True, I had seriously toyed with the idea of seeing a therapist – what woman wouldn’t feel so betrayed after twelve years of marriage? And by her best friend, no less?

But I hadn’t. Instead, I had kicked the jerk out of the house, joined a gym and had taken my frustrations out on the elliptical machine. I had lost almost fifteen pounds.

“Thanks. I’ve been keeping busy.” I swallowed the bitter lump of bile stuck in the back of my throat. “But look at you!” I arched a brow and deliberately paused for effect. “You look … nice.”

She shifted self-consciously and issued a nervous laugh. “Yeah well, you know Todd. He likes to eat.”

I glanced at my watch. “Todd’s not here yet?”

She nodded nervously.

“Gee, I hope it’s not another woman.”

Laughing, I turned and left.


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Fiction under 250 words.

random stuff

Joke: Messed Up Diagnosis

The phone rings and the lady of the house answers.

“Hello?”

“Mrs. Sanders, please.”

“Speaking.”

“Mrs. Sanders, this is Dr.Jones at St. Agnes Laboratory. When your husband’s doctor sent this biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Sanders arrived as well. We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way the results are not too good.”

“What do you mean?” Mrs. Sanders asks nervously.

“Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer’s and the other one tested positive for HIV. We can’t tell which is which.”

“That’s dreadful! Can you do the test again?” questioned Mrs. Sanders.

“Normally we can, but the new health care system will only pay for these expensive tests just one time…”

“Well, what am I supposed to do now?”

“The folks at ‘ObamaCare’ recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle of town. If he finds his way home, don’t sleep with him.”

Monday Morning Meme

Monday Morning Vlog – September 13

Questions:

1. What’s the coolest item you’ve found at a garage sale, flea market, etc?

2. Describe how your day went yesterday, but in the third-person voice. (example: Even though Karen went to the store with a list in hand, she didn’t buy one thing from her list).

3. Do you have issues with people entering your personal space? What do you do when your personal space is violated?

4. What is the one meal recipe you think you’ve mastered?