Category: Thursday Thirteen

Here are a few things I’ve learned from my travel experiences:

1. Old sun tan lotion really DOESN’T work. Don’t be a cheap skate, like me, and buy yourself some fresh lotion. Your skin will thank you.

2. When you travel, splurge and buy yourself a carry-on bag that has wheels. Your back, shoulder and arm will thank you.

3. When you travel and one stop is the beach, don’t forget to pack a beach bag – something you can cram your (fresh) suntan lotion, camera, change of clothes, towel, etc. in and take with you. Also make sure that beach bag has a zippered compartment for your important things like cash, cards, keys, etc. Your sanity will thank you.

4. Don’t forget about the home front when you’re gone. Be sure you set up some timers and set up a few lamps around your house so that it looks like you’re home in the evening. Also, don’t forget to hold your mail and any newspaper deliveries — thieves actively look for houses that have a lot of unread newspapers lying in the driveway. Also, don’t forget to turn your thermostat up, or down, and unplug computers and other appliances to save on utilities while you’re gone. Oh, and don’t forget to put a little baking soda down your kitchen sink and empty your trash bins – nothing kills a homecoming like the smell of warm garbage.

And don’t leave dirty dishes in the dishwasher – either run it, or empty it. Trust me on this one. 🙂

5. It’s always a good idea to get into decent shape before you go on a cruise, especially if you want to participate in any physical-type shore excursions (which most of them require a fair amount of walking). It’s also a good idea to get out in the sun, or tan at a tanning salon, and get a base tan before leaving so you will be less likely to get a sun burn on your trip.

6. Keep your makeup to a bare minimum. Wearing foundation is fruitless when you’re visiting islands with high humidity. I applied eye makeup and that was it. Hence the reason my face looked like one big freckle, but at least I didn’t stress about smearing makeup all over the place.

7. I used to want to book a cabin with a balcony, not so anymore! I have learned that the best cabin is on the lower deck in the middle of the ship – the boat sways a lot less and I don’t get sea sick down below. (Not to mention, it’s cheaper!)

8. Taking a cruise is really not all that expensive – the killer expense is the flight out there. We’ve always used American Airlines in the past due to our AA credit card. We should have enough points for all four of us to cash in for a cheap flight next year, (that is if the Obama administration doesn’t penalize credit card companies so much so that AA revokes the benefit in order to compensate) but when it comes time to pay full price for a flight again, we will shop around this time and not automatically assume we’re going with American Airlines. Big mistake this go-around.

9. Taking a trip really doesn’t require a travel agent. If you’re willing to do a lot of research, be patient, plan and read the fine print, you can book yourself an awesome vacation for pennies — save yourself the expense of using a travel agent, utilize the destination’s website whenever you can.

10. We took way too many bags this go-around. Next time, we’re going to buy two of those HUGE (not over 50 pounds) cases and use one for me and Kevin and one for the boys in order to save ourselves the expense of having to pay for our checked bags – both ways.

From American Airline website: Customers who purchase domestic economy class tickets will be charged $15 each way for the first checked bag and $25 each way for the second checked bag.

We had six bags to check this time around and the extra $200 + charge on our credit card was an unexpected, and unwelcome, surprise. I just hate it that airlines are charging for checked bags now.

11. Taking an e-reader device along with you is an absolute must. You can pack several books into one device and you don’t have to worry about the bulk. I took my Kindle and read two books while waiting to board and while on the flight. LOVED. IT.

12. I’m going to pack (of course, I’ll have to buy them first and there’s another drama) sundresses next time. I saw a lot of cute sundresses on the cruise and I felt a bit dowdy in my shorts and t-shirts.

13. If you take a cruise, you MUST be willing to sweat and to deal with physical discomfort. It’s simply impossible to look cute and fresh on islands that have 98% humidity. You WILL sweat, and you WILL wilt – chock it up to yet another experience and enjoy it while you can.

BONUS: 14. Roll with the punches. Sometimes, things don’t go according to plan and getting upset, or stressed, won’t help the situation. It also doesn’t make you very much fun to travel with. Trust me, I know. 😉

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I did not write these tips. These tips, and many more like these, can be found at Common Errors in English. So, if you disagree with these rules, then please, don’t kill the messenger. These are here just for your learning/entertainment, nothing more, and nothing less.

Now that you know my disclaimer, let’s move on to the juicy stuff … *rubs hands together in glee* …

(Some of these seem pretty obvious – but if you read as many blogs as I do – you’d be surprised how many confused people there are out there. I don’t care how much it is argued, grammatically incorrect writing makes writers look foolish).

1. BACK/FORWARD/UP IN TIME: For most people you move an event forward by scheduling it to happen sooner, but other people imagine the event being moved forward into the future, postponed. This is what most—but not all—people mean by saying they want to move an event back—later. Usage is also split on whether moving an event up means making it happen sooner (most common) or later (less common). The result is widespread confusion. When using these expressions make clear your meaning by the context in which you use them. “We need to move the meeting forward” is ambiguous; “we need to move the meeting forward to an earlier date” is not.

Just to confuse things further, when you move the clock ahead in the spring for daylight saving time, you make it later; but when you move a meeting ahead, you make it sooner. Isn’t English wonderful?

2. BETWEEN YOU AND ME: “Between you and me” is preferred in standard English. See I/me/myself.

3. BELOW TABLE: When calling your readers’ attention to an illustration or table further on in a text, the proper word order is not “the below table” but “the table below.”

4. BLATANT: The classic meaning of “blatant” is “noisily conspicuous,” but it has long been extended to any objectionable obviousness. A person engaging in blatant behavior is usually behaving in a highly objectionable manner, being brazen. Unfortunately, many people nowadays think that “blatant” simply means “obvious” and use it in a positive sense, as in “Kim wrote a blatantly brilliant paper.” Use “blatant” or “blatantly” only when you think the people you are talking about should be ashamed of themselves.

5. BORN/BORNE: This distinction is a bit tricky. When birth is being discussed, the past tense of “bear” is usually “born”: “I was born in a trailer—but it was an Airstream.” Note that the form used here is passive: you are the one somebody else—your mother—bore. But if the form is active, you need an “E” on the end, as in “Midnight has borne another litter of kittens in Dad’s old fishing hat” (Midnight did the bearing).

But in other meanings not having to do with birth, “borne” is always the past tense of “bear”: “My brother’s constant teasing about my green hair was more than could be borne.”

6. BROOCH/BROACH: A decorative pin is a “brooch” even though it sounds like “broach” — a quite different word. Although some dictionaries now accept the latter spelling for jewelry, you risk looking ignorant to many readers if you use it.

7. BEMUSE/AMUSE: When you bemuse someone, you confuse them, and not necessarily in an entertaining way. Don’t confuse this word with “amuse.”

8. BACKUP/BACK UP: To “back up” is an activity; “back up your computer regularly”; “back up the truck to the garden plot and unload the compost.”

A “backup” is a thing: “keep your backup copies in a safe place.” Other examples: a traffic backup, sewage backup, backup plan, backup forces.

Older writers often hyphenated this latter form (“back-up”), but this is now rare.

9. BIAS/BIASED: A person who is influenced by a bias is biased. The expression is not “they’re bias,” but “they’re biased.” Also, many people say someone is “biased toward” something or someone when they mean biased against. To have a bias toward something is to be biased in its favor.

See also “prejudice/prejudiced.”

10. BREACH/BREECH: Substitute a K for the CH in “breach” to remind you that the word has to do with breakage: you can breach (break through) a dam or breach (violate the terms of) a contract. As a noun, a breach is something broken off or open, as in a breach in a military line during combat.

“Breech” however, refers to rear ends, as in “breeches” (slang spelling “britches” ). Thus “breech cloth,” “breech birth,” or “breech-loading gun.”

“Once more unto the breach, dear friends,” means “let’s charge into the gap in the enemy’s defenses,” not “let’s reach into our pants again.”

11. BUTT NAKED/BUCK NAKED: The standard expression is “buck naked,” and the contemporary “butt naked” is an error that will get you laughed at in some circles. However, it might be just as well if the new form were to triumph. Originally a “buck” was a dandy, a pretentious, overdressed show-off of a man. Condescendingly applied in the US to Native Americans and black slaves, it quickly acquired negative connotations. To the historically aware speaker, “buck naked” conjures up stereotypical images of naked “savages” or—worse—slaves laboring naked on plantations. Consider using the alternative expression “stark naked.”

12. BREATH/BREATHE: When you need to breathe, you take a breath. “Breathe” is the verb, “breath” the noun.

13. BELIEF/BELIEVE: People can’t have religious “believes”; they have religious beliefs. If you have it, it’s a belief; if you do it, you believe.

By the by, if you’re hungry for more writing tips, you’ll find some EXCELLENT advice/lessons at Daily Writing Tips.

Visit the new Thursday 13 hub for more TT participants.

thursday thirteen

I did not write these tips. These tips, and many more like these, can be found at Common Errors in English. So, if you disagree with these rules, then please, don’t kill the messenger. These are here just for your learning/entertainment, nothing more, and nothing less.

Now that you know my disclaimer, let’s move on to the juicy stuff … *rubs hands together in glee* …

1. AS SUCH: The expression “as such” has to refer to some status mentioned earlier. “The CEO was a former drill sergeant, and as such expected everyone to obey his orders instantly.” In this case “such” refers back to “former drill sergeant.” But often people only imply that which is referred to, as in “The CEO had a high opinion of himself and as such expected everyone to obey his orders instantly.” Here the “such” cannot logically refer back to “opinion.” Replace “as such” with “therefore.”

2. ASSURE/ENSURE/INSURE: To “assure” a person of something is to make him or her confident of it. According to Associated Press style, to “ensure” that something happens is to make certain that it does, and to “insure” is to issue an insurance policy. Other authorities, however, consider “ensure” and “insure” interchangeable. To please conservatives, make the distinction. However, it is worth noting that in older usage these spellings were not clearly distinguished.

3. ASTROLOGY/ASTRONOMY: Modern astronomers consider astrology an outdated superstition. You’ll embarrass yourself if you use the term “astrology” to label the scientific study of the cosmos. In writing about history, however, you may have occasion to note that ancient astrologers, whose main goal was to peer into the future, incidentally did some sound astronomy as they studied the positions and movements of celestial objects.

4. ATM MACHINE: “ATM” means “Automated Teller Machine,” so if you say “ATM machine” you are really saying, “Automated Teller Machine machine.”

5. ATTAIN/OBTAIN: “Attain” means “reach” and “obtain” means “get.” You attain a mountaintop, but obtain a rare baseball card. “Attain” usually implies a required amount of labor or difficulty; nothing is necessarily implied about the difficulty of obtaining that card. Maybe you just found it in your brother’s dresser drawer.

Some things you obtain can also be attained. If you want to emphasize how hard you worked in college, you might say you attained your degree; but if you want to emphasize that you have a valid degree that qualifies you for a certain job, you might say you obtained it. If you just bought it from a diploma mill for fifty bucks, you definitely only obtained it. (HAHA!)

6. AVENGE/REVENGE: When you try to get vengeance for people who’ve been wronged, you want to avenge them. You can also avenge a wrong itself: “He avenged the murder by taking vengeance on the killer.” Substituting “revenge” for “avenge” in such contexts is very common, but frowned on by some people. They feel that if you seek revenge in the pursuit of justice you want to avenge wrongs: not revenge them.

7. AWAY/A WAY: “Jessica commented on my haircut in a way that made me think maybe I shouldn’t have let my little sister do it for me.” In this sort of context, “a way” should always be two distinct words, though many people use the single word “away” instead. If you’re uncertain, try substituting another word for “way”: “in a manner that,” “in a style that.” If the result makes sense, you need the two-word phrase. Then you can tell Jessica to just go away. (HAHA, this guy’s funny!)

8. A WHILE/AWHILE: When “awhile” is spelled as a single word, it is an adverb meaning “for a time” (“stay awhile”); but when “while” is the object of a prepositional phrase, like “Lend me your monkey wrench for a while” the “while” must be separated from the “a.” (But if the preposition “for” were lacking in this sentence, “awhile” could be used in this way: “Lend me your monkey wrench awhile.”) (Clear as mud?)

9. BACKSLASH/SLASH: This is a slash: /. Because the top of it leans forward, it is sometimes called a “forward slash.”

This is a backslash: \. Notice the way it leans back, distinguishing it from the regular slash.

10. BALL/BAWL: To “bawl” is to cry out loudly, so when you break down in tears you bawl like a baby and when you reprimand people severely you bawl them out. Don’t use “ball” in these sorts of expressions. It has a number of meanings, but none of them have to do with shouting and wailing unless you’re shouting “play ball!”

11. BARE/BEAR: There are actually three words here. The simple one is the big growly creature (unless you prefer the Winnie-the-Pooh type). Hardly anyone past the age of ten gets that one wrong. The problem is the other two. Stevedores bear burdens on their backs and mothers bear children. Both mean “carry” (in the case of mothers, the meaning has been extended from carrying the child during pregnancy to actually giving birth). But strippers bare their bodies—sometimes bare-naked. The confusion between this latter verb and “bear” creates many unintentionally amusing sentences; so if you want to entertain your readers while convincing them that you are a dolt, by all means mix them up. “Bear with me,” the standard expression, is a request for forbearance or patience. “Bare with me” would be an invitation to undress. “Bare” has an adjectival form: “The pioneers stripped the forest bare.”

12. BARTER/HAGGLE: When you offer to trade your vintage jeans for a handwoven shirt in Guatemala, you are engaged in barter—no money is involved. One thing (or service) is traded for another.

But when you offer to buy that shirt for less money than the vendor is asking, you are engaged in haggling or bargaining, not bartering.

13. BESIDE/BESIDES: “Besides” can mean “in addition to” as in “besides the puppy chow, Spot scarfed up the filet mignon I was going to serve for dinner.” “Beside,” in contrast, usually means “next to.” “I sat beside Cheryl all evening, but she kept talking to Jerry instead.” Using “beside” for “besides,” won’t usually get you in trouble; but using “besides” when you mean “next to” will.

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Thirteen sure fire ways to screw up your marriage from Happily Ever After. (You can find 20 MORE sure fire ways to screw up your marriage at Happily Ever After).

1. Your relationship with your children is more important than your relationship with your spouse.

2. You refuse to compromise. It’s your way or the divorce court.

3. You constantly brush off your spouse’s sexual advances because you are “not in the mood.” You do not look into ways to get yourself in the mood. Thus, you can’t remember the last time you had sex.

4. You let yourself go. You no longer take steps to make yourself sexy and desirable for your spouse. Sometimes, you don’t even brush your teeth or bother to make sure you don’t have B.O.

5. You refuse to give your husband the “atta boy” for doing mundane things like emptying the dishwasher simply because he never gives you an “atta girl” for doing the same thing.

6. You never tell your wife that she’s sexy, beautiful or hot, simply because she never thanks you for emptying the dishwasher.

7. You only hug your wife or grab her rear when you want to get busy. You never do it just to make her feel good.

8. You belittle your spouse in front of other people.

9. You refuse to give your spouse a second chance. You hold every single indiscretion against him for eternity, no matter how many times he’s said, “I’m sorry” and no matter how successfully he’s changed his behavior.

10. You only practice random acts of kindness with strangers. You don’t do it for your spouse.

11. You can’t bring yourself to say, “I’m sorry” even though you know you were wrong.

12. You make fights with your spouse about “who is right” rather than about “how can we fix this.”

13. You don’t take turns reaching each other’s dreams. You think your spouse is there to support you and not the other way around.

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And speaking of marriage …

Beginning Sunday, May 17th, I’d like to post the first 10 challenges (one challenge a day for 10 days) from the Love Dare book for you to sample and even try, if you’re brave enough (why yes, that IS a challenge!!).

And I’d like to giveaway one (possibly two, depending on demand) Love Dare book and one Fireproof DVD in the process.

All you have to do is comment on the current day’s challenge. That’s it. And if you actually TRY it, then your comment will be worth two tickets instead of one.

I’m doing this because I truly believe in the message behind the challenge and the movie. It’s time we shifted our focus, renewed our minds and worked toward healing our marriages – not ending them.

I hope you’ll consider joining me. I too will be trying these challenges out on my husband and I’ll let you know my results.

Sounds easy, doesn’t it. Just wake up one morning and be happy. And in some respects, it is, if you just believe it to be so.

However, sometimes it just doesn’t work out that way. My advice? Evaluate your life. What areas, exactly, are making you unhappy? Is there anything YOU can do to change that situation? Be honest. Sometimes it takes a mental adjustment on our part to make situations change; don’t be selfish or stingy with your desire to be happy.

Don’t whine about it. Be proactive in your quest to be happy.

The bottom line? Make the change. Life is too short to be sad and unhappy all the time.

Here are some tips to get you started on your road to happiness:

1. Make up your mind to be happy. Learn to find pleasure in simple things.

2. Make the best of your circumstances. No one has everything, and everyone has something of sorrow intermingled with gladness of life. The trick is to make the laughter outweigh the tears.

3. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Don’t think that somehow you should be protected from misfortune that befalls other people.

4. You can’t please everybody. Don’t let criticism worry you.

5. Don’t let your neighbor set your standards. Be yourself.

6. Do things you enjoy doing but stay out of debt.

7. Never borrow trouble. Imaginary things are harder to bear than real ones.

8. Since hate poisons the soul, do not cherish jealousy, avoid people who make you unhappy.

9. Have many interests. If you can’t travel, read about new places.

10. Don’t hold postmortems. Don’t spend your time brooding over sorrows or mistakes. Don’t be one who never gets over things.

11. Do what you can for those less fortunate than yourself.

12. Keep busy at something. A busy person never has time to be unhappy.

13. Happiness can not be inherited, purchased, rented, imported, or bargained for. It must be home-grown.

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1. How ironic that my niece, who was homeschooled, just made a commercial for our public school system. I wonder if anyone will be upset by that fact? Hhmm …

2. A Cleveland Ohio area principal says he’s embarrassed his students got proof of their “educaiton” on their high school diplomas. HE’S embarrassed. Those poor kids are most likely mortified to be associated with a school that misspells education.

3. Don’t chew your kids out in your underwear; they have a tendency to not take you seriously.

4. Shampoo tip: Buy cheapy shampoos at your favorite retail store to use everyday (especially after either working out or sweating profusely – as in my case when I walk to the mailbox. What. I bathe in sweat). Then, when your hair is feeling like straw, buy Redken Clear Moisture. This stuff ROCKS! It puts moisture back into your hair and makes it shiny again. This is especially good for those of us who color our hair. Also, if you want your hair to do what it needs to do and look AWESOME for that special night out on the town or when you go shopping at Target and need to impress the other soccer moms (you know who you are), buy Redken All Soft. I swear by this stuff, it’s that good. Sure, Redken is more expensive, but if you use it sparingly (i.e. in between your normal cheapy shampoos) then it lasts a lot longer and you can fool our stylist into thinking you spend a fortune on your hair. hehe (Disclaimer: Redken did not pay me to tell you this. However, if Redken would LIKE to pay me for saying this, I’m certainly not going to object. *grin*)

5. I seriously need to stay away from Amazon!!! I’m on a mission to buy books JUST BECAUSE I qualify for free shipping. I’m sick! I need help! Anyone want to start an Amazon Annoymous? …….. What, I’m serious!!

6. I’m on a mission to clean out my closet. In fact, I plan on participating in Tackle it Tuesday this week because doing something for my blog is the only way I’m motivated to do ANYTHING nowadays. In fact, I should do MORE Tackle it Tuesdays – I know of at least one person who would love that, Kevin. (I’m not a big tackle it person, in case you didn’t know that).

7. Twitter, why do you hate me so? I’ve been a good girl, I’ve been feeding you on a regular basis, why do you feel the need to bite the hand that feeds you? Can you tell me why every third tweet I post you gobble up? Must you be so greedy with your tweets? If you don’t watch yourself, you’re going to turn into an ugly turkey – one that I won’t hesitate to cook and eat and then belch all over your pretty blue feathers.

8. I have a new heroine.

Vodpod videos no longer available.

“Life is too sweet to be bitter.” Amen, sister, amen.

Crazy Sexy Cancer is more than a thought provoking film, it’s an attitude! It’s about rising to the challenge of life and turning lemons into champagne.

9. Did you guys know about the Dewey’s Read-a-thon? This sounds like so much fun to me AND a great opportunity to cross off those smaller, quick reads off my list. I’m thinking I just may participate. How about you?

10. Spring Break starts for us in just two days. I can’t wait. I’m so ready. We don’t have any plans; I think we’re all just looking forward to sleeping in everyday.

11. My nephew got a voice recorder for his birthday and now I’m thinking about buying one. I’m sure they have come a long way since those teeny-tiny tapes, right? Surely you can just pop the memory card into your computer and upload the sound file? I have no idea what I’d use it for, but when has that stopped me in the past?

12. We’ve promised MK that we would upgrade his saxophone over spring break. We found quite a few promising prospects on Musician’s Friend – the problem with that? He sort of needs to play it to see if he likes it. So, we’re thinking of visiting area music stores and trying various brands and then buying it for cheaper online. Is that wrong?

13. With unemployment rates skyrocketing, I’m starting to feel guilty for booking our cruise. Is it right to go on a fancy vacation when so many people are hurting? And will I make people mad if I post about it on my blog? Ready or not, we set sail in just a few short months.

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