At the Moment

What Does Your Bedroom Say About You?

First of all, this video really doesn’t tell you squat about your bedroom, but hey, I thought you might be interested in my bedroom so here we go – let’s psychoanalyze me.

Yes. This is my bedroom. No. It’s not Kevin’s bedroom. Yes, you are correct, we are married and we do not share a bedroom.

Psychoanalyze away.

Actually, I’ll help you. We don’t share a bedroom because I’m a fish and he’s Darth Vader. Let me explain. I am constantly flipping/flopping around in my sleep. I don’t know if I’m dreaming or the bed is just uncomfortable. Probably both. Also, I snore. Yes. I just freely admitted that. And it’s not a cute little woman snore either. It’s a deep, chain saw snore and no one can sleep through that, let alone my poor husband. And yes, I know this for a fact because Kevin has recorded me snoring before. Because I INSISTED, for YEARS, I did not snore.

Alas, I snore.

Kevin is Darth Vader. Meaning, he uses a C-Pap machine at night. He has to. He has sleep apnea. He did a sleep study and they said he stopped breathing about 80 times that night. I actually MADE him do a sleep study because there would be nights he would stop breathing and I would nudge him just to kick start him again. It was scary enough I insisted he get tested.

And I was right. (Of course *snicker).

Now. He uses a C-Pap and he sleeps way better at night, however, he sounds like Darth Vader and I can’t handle it. In fact, there were nights I wanted to take a pillow and ……. well, never mind.

So we don’t sleep together. We can’t. Because we don’t sleep. And we wake up tired and cranky not only with each other, but at the world at large and that’s no way to start your day, every day. It got so bad, we were becoming zombies and we decided we had had enough – we couldn’t do it anymore. Now, I have my bedroom, Kevin has his bedroom, we get much better sleep and we’re both happier people.

(And we’re still married).

Anyway. This is where I sleep. Let’s analyze …

  1. See those clothes on the rocking chair? And the shoes/slippers next to the rocking chair? Yeah, those clothes are there every day. I don’t even bother putting them away and here’s why, because I’m just going to get them back out again and frankly, I just don’t care. The clothes that are on the chair are as follows: Sweatpants, t-shirt (2), sweatshirt, shorts, bras. I wear sweatpants, t-shirt and sweatshirt to bed and the second t-shirt and shorts after my showers in the morning because mama is hot and has to cool down before dressing for work. The bras are there because again, why put them away when I’m going to put it back on less than 12 hours later? The khaki capris on the back of the chair? Yeah, those have been there for a few months because I’m too lazy to put them away. But hey! They will be ready to wear when spring hits. Yes, I’m one of those lazy people who kick my shoes off and leave them where I kicked them. However, I HAVE gotten better about moving them out of the middle of the room because I’ve tripped over them before and nearly broke a tooth landing on something so … erhm, lesson learned.
  2. I bought a new comforter set for my bed but if you notice, the bedskirt does not match in any way. It’s because I keep forgetting to look for a brown bedskirt when I go shopping and frankly I don’t care enough to make an effort to remember. It’s a bedskirt, who cares. (Yes, those are scrub pants on the bed – I’ll hang them up! Sheesh)
  3. This is where I literally throw all my jewelry and scarves. (And yes, more clothes). Do I have a place for all of my jewelry? Actually, yes. On top of my vanity. That’s the place I have designated for my jewelry. Judge away.
  4. My dirty-ass fan. I have no idea where the front part of that fan is and I don’t care. It still runs though I’ve had it for about five years and I run it every night because it gives me white noise so I can sleep (I’m a super light sleeper and I need something in the background so I don’t jerk away at the slightest creak, groan, or damn dog). It’s also dirty. Judge away.

The master bathroom is off to the left and our dirty clothes hamper is off to the right. Not pictured, the treadmill is in front of the curtain on the right and Blake’s shorts and t-shirt is hanging off the treadmill because he often comes over during the day to watch the TV that is on a shelf on the wall in front of the treadmill. I have no idea why he hangs his clothes on the treadmill.


So according to the video, I’m a slob. Well, it doesn’t say that but I think we can all agree it’s true. Or, we could say I’m “bigger-picture oriented” as the video says and I would agree with that. Mama ain’t got time to put things away; I’m already thinking about what I need to do for the next day. And again, I’m just going to drag that stuff out again, why put it away? I like to conserve my energy, I seem to have less and less every day.

If I had to sum my bedroom up in three words? Self-contained organized chaos. (Hyphenated words count as one!)

What three words would you use to describe your bedroom?