I’m finishing up season three of “The Walking Dead.”

I admit, I wasn’t sure if I could stomach this series. A gal I work with first told me about the series and I thought, “sure, I’ll watch the pilot and go from there.”

I watched the pilot and just sat in stunned silence. I turned the TV off and just stared at a black screen.

What the HELL did I just watch? It was bloody and super gory and what was I doing wasting my time on something so … dark and disturbing?

I had no intention of watching any more episodes. It was just too much, it disturbed me and though it didn’t exactly give me nightmares, I confess, it took me a while to fall asleep that night.

I went back to work the next day and looked at the girl who advised me to watch it with new eyes. Had I misjudged her? Because honestly, what sort of person LIKES that sort of thing?? But I kept my mouth shut; I like to think I give people the benefit of the doubt. I made a deal with myself – I’d watch one more episode, see if it was any less gory, and see how I felt after that.

I became … curious. I can’t say I liked it any better and after almost three seasons, I still can’t say I like it any better, but it intrigued me. The whole premise intrigues me. Because the story is about so much more than a world that is suddenly overrun with flesh-eating zombies, it’s about human behavior and the extent people will go to in order to survive. When people are faced with life and death situations, the survival instinct takes over and people evolve (or devolve??) into a completely different personality. They turn into people they would normally associate with cold-blooded killers – but if it meant closing the door on personal morals in order to protect those I loved, I’m not sure I wouldn’t start toting a gun and routinely shooting zombies in the head, either.

I’ve always been fascinated by that story line – not about a world overrun with zombies, but a world where people have to make really hard and uncomfortable choices. How far would you go in order to survive? I’d like to think I would end up being a bad ass – someone who thinks quick on her feet and was a valuable member of my little society, but I don’t know – maybe not. Maybe I would end up being one of the whiny, sniffling cry babies that I get so impatient with on the show.

I confess, I don’t dig this sort of show, and after a while, you sort of become desensitized to the blood and gore and pay more attention to the characters’ struggles. Many fight their inner demons and make surprising choices – some characters completely lose their minds.

But who wouldn’t in a world full of zombies?

I’m hoping that season four is more about what exactly happened to the world. How did the virus, or zombie sickness get started? Is there a cure? Is there any way to stop the process and how many “humans” are actually left? Though the story has been really interesting so far, and has thrown quite a few plot twists in there, so many, in fact, that I’m actually surprised and compelled to keep watching to see what main character dies next, it’s almost becoming boring – it’s the same thing episode after episode – conflict, they kill lots of zombies, we watch zombies snack on other humans, tears are shed, more killing, decisions are agonized over, more zombie fights/killings … *yawn*

I’m almost relieved the season is over. Because I’m ready to move on to something a lot less dark and a lot more “human.”