One of these days, I’ll actually catch up to these Reflections’ entries. I really want to finish these because they’re an extension/expansion of the daily journal I write in. I have to say, it’s pretty fun to go back and read my journal. I will likely never read it again.
Apr 1
I’m looking forward to taking two weeks off next month. Still no word about my co-worker leaving – when is her last day? What is the plan after she leaves? But let’s be honest – my job is okay, and I even enjoy it, but our management team is a little like a Tom/Jerry cartoon – pure chaos. We’ll see. Kevin and I looked into Viking Cruises. I know I sound like a spoiled brat saying this, but we’re, (okay, me), sort of bored with “traditional” cruises. We’ve taken … close to 20 – Kevin is likely closer to 20 than me, he’s taken a cruise with LeRoy and the boys without me before, but we’re ready for something different. A Viking cruise is on our bucket list – but geez louise, they’re expensive.
Apr 2
Word is management is thinking of turning our group into precert/call center. WTH? On one hand, I get it. We are the middle man between the patient and registration – we run the tests, update the documents and registration has to call the patients to reschedule/cancel depending on our results. I’m sure registration gets yelled at – they work with the public after all. But part of the biggest reason I wanted this remote job was so that I WOULDN’T have to talk to people. I had had enough of that working in a Neurosurgery clinic for 12 years. I’m DONE with that. I’m ticked, not gonna lie. I don’t see how in the world we can get our work done if we’re constantly being interrupted by ringing phones. The insurance portals we work out of are timed, so .. I’m in the middle of a case, my phone rings, it’s a patient, I time out of the portal on a case I’m in the middle of, the case goes to pending and suddenly I’m having to get the provider involved because I couldn’t finish before it timed out? Um, no, I don’t think so. If anything, let’s put some sort of chat feature together that patients can reach out to find out if their insurance has approved their tests – I would be down with that option. But calm down, Karen, it’s only a rumor, let’s see how this shakes out.
Apr 3
Our new luggage is here! Our new luggage is here! It’s hard shell. We’ve never had hard shell before – it’s always been the soft cloth luggage. It’s so pretty! It’s blue, but a dark blue, like a purple blue. When I picked up the box, I got worried – it was so heavy! My first thought was, “oh no, I’m going to have to stress about how heavy this ends up being.” But once I opened the box and took out all three pieces, I wasn’t that worried anymore. They were all pretty light weight. I’m excited to use it! We haven’t bought new luggage in forever and the luggage we currently use is still fine, but the wheels are wonky and again, I don’t want to have to stress about my luggage while mom and I run through airports to make our connecting flights. (Gosh – I hope that doesn’t happen). Since they’re such a common color though, I’m thinking about buying luggage bands. We’ll see. I’ve been having a BLAST watching travel/pack videos and shopping for neat don’t-really-need-but-are-cool travel items on Amazon.
Apr 5
It poured today! We’ve had so much rain these past three days. It was chilly, too, so mom wanted to go to Wendy’s for some chili. They still have the best chili, in my opinion. We ate inside and there were two homeless guys near us who literally had their belongs sprawled across several tables. One was asleep and snoring. Mom and I got nervous and kept our purses close. The manager finally came out and told them to leave. I’m sure they were taking shelter from the rain and my heart goes out to them, but also, life is full of choices, some good, some bad, but ultimately, all have consequences. Mom and I talked about our cruise and what shore excursions we wanted to take. They’re booking up fast! I need to get a move on and book them before all of the good ones are taken. Mom doesn’t really care, she trusts me to just pick them. Gah – I’m nervous now. lol
Apr 7
Bit the bullet and booked our shore excursions yesterday! Ended up spending about $600, which YIKES. We happen to be taking one of the most expensive cruises available, (Alaska – Hawaii is also expensive), but it will be SO WORTH IT. Alaska is GORGEOUS! Kevin and I went several years ago. I’d like to go back again with Kevin one of these days. I was able to cash in $250 dollar ship credit though so it brought the cost of the excursions down by nearly half, so that was a nice perk. Booked the times for afternoon because Kevin and I have done all early morning excursions before and it was exhausting! Want to have fun but don’t want to wear mom (or me – mom is in better shape than me, truth be told), out too much. I’m so excited for this cruise!
Apr 8
Feeling a little guilty about how much money I’ve been spending for this cruise. But I really want to take this trip – who knows if I ever get to do something like this with my mom again, so the money is worth it. Its only money, right?? You live once, right?? There are a few more things I want to buy before the trip but I need to stretch this out, let the pocketbook cool off a bit. I’m getting my hair done soon – crap – there goes another $100.
Apr 9
Kevin wants to keep the Jeep.
I have a feeling I may have to fight him a little bit on that. I mean, don’t get me wrong, driving a Jeep Wrangler is super fun .. and the whole Jeep community is pretty great, too, (doing the lazy finger lift to wave at passing Jeeps is always fun), but WOW, this little beauty is expensive. Like, stupid expensive. And we’re leasing … oh, for SOO many reasons. This is our first time leasing but we’ll likely continue to lease for the foreseeable future. There are pros/cons, but it’s worth it to us to have a car that is reliable and if it needs anything, we can just take it to the dealer and have it fixed. Cars are so complicated anymore – it’s not like we can go down to O’Reilly’s and grab a spare part. The Jeep has SIX computers. Dude. However – we DO need to take some road trips before we turn her, (yes, she’s a she), back in April 2028.
Apr 10
Had an impromptu meeting with my supervisor today. She didn’t sugar coat it – she flat out said that we have to continue cleaning up other people’s crap, i.e. work other people’s messy, sloppy cases and if I didn’t like it, perhaps I need to go to another group. Well, alrighty then. I appreciated her honesty, at least. Now I know what to expect. I have some thinking to do, I suppose. I most likely just need to cool my jets and stop being a brat. Overall, I like this job. I LOVE being remote and I know I’m good at what I do. This is a big con, but it’s not a deal breaker for me. At least, not yet.
Apr 11
Had the day off today. No reason, really. I take random Fridays off here/there just to recharge my mental health. I hate when people talk about mental health, I feel like it’s a lot of woo-woo talk from crazy, sensitive boneheads, (I’m a Gen X’er – need I say more?), but honestly, it IS a thing. It’s mentally exhausting to juggle so many duties, personalities, carry the entire group on my shoulders, just call me Atlas. Didn’t really have anything planned – I went ahead and got on the treadmill this morning like usual, (I try and walk at least three times during the workweek since I sit on my butt all day, every day). I typically walk about one hour each time while I listen to trance music, (hey don’t laugh – it’s energetic and gets me revved up), and watch Asian made-for-TV shows on Amazon Prime. I like to read the sub-titles because it distracts me so much from the treadmill. Kevin and I made our monthly trip to Wal-Mart, (he HATES going to Wal-Mart so we try and only go once a month), and while I was doing research, dotting my i’s and crossing my t’s on the Royal Caribbean site, I noticed that I had listed mom’s name as Barb on our tickets but her full legal name is Barbara. I am SO GLAD that I thought to look further into that because if her name doesn’t match what’s on her passport, they might not let her board. OMG – so I called Royal Caribbean and got that changed. Thank GOD they didn’t give me any trouble over that. Wow … I’m an idiot. I just want this trip to go smoothly.
Apr 12
Mom came over today. I’ve been recording our conversations when we talk to my sister on Google Meet. The last one I recorded was May 2024. I need to get back to it. I know she hates it, and it does feel a little awkward at first, until you forget the camera and the ring light are in your face, but I’m doing it on purpose with purpose. Mom talks about listening to the cassette tapes her, her mom and sisters would send to each other when she lived outside our home town. They were audio letters to each other and I think that’s so cool. To be able to listen to each other talk, hear their voices (they’re all gone now) .. what a cool memory. So, I thought I would do that with mom but put her on camera as well. I want see and hear my momma after she passes. My dad dying – it’s made me super sensitive to death and appreciating life while we still have it. Gave mom an invoice of her financial share of the cruise – yeah – it was a lot. But it will be so WORTH IT!
Apr 14
Got my hand virtually slapped today. I was basically told to sit down and shut up, in a manager-ish sort of way. You know the manager talk – a lot of words, don’t really say anything. I was told that being handed a virtual mop and bucket was now part of my job and that it’s. Stop bitching about it. This asinine decision has come from higher management (doesn’t it always?) and my immediate bosses can’t do anything about it. My immediate bosses are actually pretty great, I truly like them, and I get it, if you don’t have the power, if you want to keep your job, you continue to smile, nod and take it up the butt. Fine. I’ll just continue to get overtime, I guess. I truly don’t mind working so much, I like those numbers on my paycheck, but it’s the principle of it. When you are asked to clean up other people’s messes, that naturally trickles down to people don’t care to do a good job, because why? When people know someone else is going to clean it up, and there’s no accountability, why? But whatever – I’ll accept my destiny – for now.
Apr 15
Mom got a surprise visit from her great granddaughter! H was in town with her class to go to the Discovery Center and H’s mom decided to drop by and say hello. F is a good person, and is always thinking of my mom. Mom was SO happy to see them. Warms my heart.
Apr 16
Blake sent Kevin a picture – of an ant attack in their bathroom. There is probably one in the kitchen, too. What do you expect from a bachelor pad? (Though – some women are pretty nasty, too), I hate to see it, but also, maybe this will be a motivation for them to keep their house clean. There is also nothing more jarring than stumbling into the bathroom first thing, pulling back the shower curtain only to waken with a jolt when you see a spider in the tub desperately trying to crawl out. Ah Spring, how I hate thee.
Apr 17
Booked Mama Mia tickets to the Alamo for Mother’s Day. I booked three tickets since my sister mentioned she might come down. Even if she doesn’t, that’s okay, I would rather have a ticket than not. I’m excited for mom to have that dinner/movie experience.
Apr 18
Got a ton of overtime this week. I was working two people’s jobs since my co-worker was out on vacation. Should be a pretty decent check.
Apr 19
Went to moms. Had lunch at McAlisters then back to her house for Survivor, crafting and talking to sis. I think mom is starting to come back to the land of living since dad died. She’s been walking around in a shocked daze since he passed. It’s good to see. I was truly worried about her.
Apr 20
Easter! Mom came over and she put a scavenger hunt together – we all participated. Brandon got all of the items first. We had flying saucers for dinner, (fried tortilla shells topped with hamburger meat, pinto beans and all the taco trimmings), then played three rounds of Sequence. We love that game. We decided to get together in the evening to make it easier for Blake to be there since he’s been working nights.
Apr 21
Sun was out but it’s been wet and windy so far this Spring. Kevin and I feel like characters out of the Wizard of Oz, walking through the poppies – the tree pollen pretty much knocks us out. Kev comes home and just collapses in his recliner because the pollen makes him so sleepy. Both of us. I have more of a problem with Ragweed in the Fall but when the temps drastically change – like 30 to 40 degree difference IN ONE DAY, my sinuses squeeze so much they trigger massive headaches. Not fun. Did I mention I hate Spring?
Apr 22
Had a department meeting today to talk about communication. Or the lack thereof. Because we’ve been asked to clean up other people’s messy cases, when we run into a problem and contact that analyst abut it, she gets butt hurt, complains to management and management comes back and says, “Now, now, we are not asking you to audit your peers …” Um – bitch- that’s EXACTLY what you’re asking!! If someone is consistently making mistakes, we’re not supposed to say something? What about “learning opportunities” as management likes to call it. The meeting pissed me off so much I “lost connection” and left the meeting. I’ve never done that before but I knew if I didn’t exit the situation, I may not have a job tomorrow.
Apr 23
Shit show today. I worked a 12-hour shift because one of my co-workers left early and the other one had to leave unexpectedly due to family issues. That left me with useless chatty Cathy. I ended up doing all the work and of course, it was a one step forward, two-step backward sort of day. I was mentally exhausted when I finally clocked off. I have so much overtime right now – and it’s only Wednesday!
Apr 24
Mom gave me a check for her portion of the cruise, Seattle hotel room, excursions … yikes – it was a lot of money. I pray everything goes smoothly. I want mom to enjoy herself. For this much money, we better enjoy ourselves!
Apr 25
My pissy attitude and mouthing off is starting to affect the team. I think they’re over it, and me. So – I need to just shut up, keep my suggestions to myself and do my work. Why am I trying to make sense out of something that doesn’t make sense? I’m driving myself crazy, and from the sounds of it, I’m driving my co-workers nuts, too. A blast went out today giving people permission to work this weekend and get overtime. Here’s a thought – why not have everyone do their own damn work and then there wouldn’t be a need to ask people to work overtime. Oops – there I go again, making a suggestion. AARGH.
Apr 26
Mom came over. We ate at Zaxby’s. We were both disappointed with the quality of food. This was our second time going and we just aren’t impressed enough to go back again, I think. We bought some cookies at Crumbl Cookie for our treat – OMG – they are so good but SO EXPENSIVE. We bought four cookies for $20!! However – technically, the cookies are big enough they are really two cookies in one. We split the cookies we bought. We got Raspberry cheescake, Reese’s peanut butter, chocolate chip, and double layer carrot cake. Filmed mom talking – it was a nice chat.
Apr 28
Book sale at the library is on Wednesday. I would love to go – I used to LIVE for those sales. So many cheap books. I love the smell of books, the comradery of being around other people who also love books, not that I talk to anyone, but still … Kevin wasn’t really interested in books for a long time, but he’s getting back into reading and really loves buying non-fiction books for dirt cheap when he’s out looking for inventory for his thrift market booths. But now, I don’t go to book sales. I don’t buy physical books anymore. It’s all e-books. I know this is a controversial topic – physical books or e-books – but I’m in the e-book category. I love that I can carry so many books in one device and not have to find room to store a physical book and/or think about how I’m going to get rid of my excess books. Even though I don’t buy physical books anymore, I do sort of miss going to the book sale.
Apr 29
Tornado sirens went off at 9:00 this AM. Lights flickered but didn’t go out. I’m surprised, we usually lose our power whenever someone sneezes. It got pitch black and very still .. it was kind of scary. So I shut my computer down and Kev called me to ask if I wanted to come over to the rental house, (which is across the street) to go into the basement. I didn’t end up going over there. Kev’s dad was over at the house, he was watching him while his mom participated in her Bible study class. His dad is declining fast. He gets around okay, but he forgets things so it’s really not safe for him to be unsupervised for any length of time. But that’s okay, Kevin enjoys spending time with his dad. We ended up losing a few limbs, (shocker – our trees drop limbs at the slightest breeze), but overall, it wasn’t bad and we didn’t have to take cover.
Apr 30
Well, 50,000 people lost power in our city yesterday and are still out today. I feel bad for not thinking it was very bad – it wasn’t bad for us. I was also shocked because our neighborhood is usually one of the first to lose power, and we didn’t this time. In fact, we lose power so much Kevin and I have talked about investing in a home generator. So that if we lose power, the generator automatically kicks in and is powerful enough to power everything in our house. I would love to have one of those, but they are EXPENSIVE. And though we lose power frequently, I’m not sure we lose it enough to justify paying for a home generator. I left the house to grab some lunch and again was shocked to see a few of our neighbors’ trees had exploded in their yards. Luckily, it didn’t look like it hit their houses, so thank goodness for that. We really did get off lucky. (Not luck – God protected us). According to the city map, it looked like mom was out of power but she said she hadn’t lost it when I checked on her. Thank goodness. Did I mention I hate this time of year?
Write From Karen 