On Loan

26 Feb

The woman’s face on the card mocked her. She placed her thumb over the tiny photo and inserted it into the machine.

“Hurry up!” her boyfriend hissed while keeping an eye out for anyone approaching the tiny, glass room.

Melanie ignored him and entered in the four-digit security code. She finished punching in her demands and waited.

The machine whirred and clicked, but nothing came out.

“Are you freaking kidding me?” Dylan shouted.

“Shh!” Melanie stared at the machine. She jumped as it came to life and the ATM machine began dispensing twenties.

Dylan smiled.

She scooped up the cash but felt sad.

“I’m sorry, grandma.”

.

.

.

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Write up to 100 words, fact or fiction….

This is a themed writing meme hosted by Jenny Matlock. The goal is to write something that does not exceed 100 words (not including said prompt). The prompt is in italics above.

7 Responses to “On Loan”

  1. June Freaking Cleaver March 4, 2011 at 9:30 pm #

    I’m afraid that this happens far to often in real life – and that, sometimes, there is a young person who is encouraging another to commit a crime.

  2. jo February 28, 2011 at 1:00 am #

    i wanna just slap some sense into her …
    well written!

  3. Nonna Beach February 27, 2011 at 11:54 pm #

    A very nice job and a devastating ending !!!

  4. Sue Anderson February 27, 2011 at 10:00 am #

    Oh, no! This is not acceptable!! (And very well done…)
    ;)

    PS. I’m late with my Centus this week, but here it is:
    Sheethead by Sue

  5. Kat February 27, 2011 at 9:03 am #

    This is very sad, but very well written. You can feel the furtive desperation with every word. Nicely done.

  6. Judie February 27, 2011 at 9:01 am #

    I want to just turn her over my knee and give her a good spanking! Her own grandma! And that Dylan! what a worthless creep!

  7. claudia February 27, 2011 at 6:20 am #

    One line changed the whole mood to sadness…powerful!

Comments are closed.

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