Write From Karen

Thirteen “B” Words that Describe my Life

Scrolling through my life, one letter at a time.

By the way, this makes my 113th TT.

1. Boring – I’m not a thrill seeker. The most excitement I have all week is renting a new movie. I don’t like to spend a lot of money so I’ve conditioned myself to be satisfied with doing free stuff- like reading, riding my bike or surfing the web (which isn’t necessarily free, but you get the idea). Though I’m not exactly boring to hang out with, I’m not someone who will keep you awake, either.

2. Blessed – I have an awesome family. Not a perfect family, but an awesome family. Though my oldest son is hormonal, moody and sullen, I still catch glimpses of his true personality and that usually holds me over until the next bout of crappy behavior. My youngest is a sweet, thoughtful, goofy, small kid who is constantly surprising me. My husband is a kind, thoughtful man who is okay with me staying home and making virtually no money (I’m working on that, honey!)

3. Bitchy – I’m a fairly nice person (emphasis on fairly), but I do indeed have hours moments when I’m, um, a tad on the snarky side. This usually occurs when I encounter stupid people, or I’m forced to do something I don’t want to do, or I have a headache, or I’m tired, or … well hell, this isn’t looking good.

4. Bubbly – Though I am boring and can be bitchy, I can also be bubbly when the occasion calls for such behavior. But it’s a fun, carefree bubbly, not the kind of bubbly some women get so that you feel like poking them with a needle just to allow all that excess happiness out.

5. Bloated – This is an ongoing condition with me. I have digestive problems (my mother thinks it’s gall bladder related, but we won’t go there until it gets REALLY bad) so I constantly feel bloated and puffy. As a result, I rarely feel sexy.

6. Believable – I’m an excellent liar. In fact, if this was an admirable trait, I’d put it on my resume. I can make anybody believe anything – with a straight face and sincere eyes. Seriously. Did I tell you about the time I participated in a Missouri beauty pageant? No? Some other time then.

7. Baloney – Most of the stuff you read on this blog? Baloney. I’m not exactly lying (though I bet you’re wondering now), but I rarely tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth so help me God. Oh, and I hate baloney – both literal and figurative. The actual baloney meat makes me feel bloated (see? Always bloated), but the figurative baloney I get from people drives me insane. If you’re going to lie, then lie WELL, for pete sakes.

8. Berate – I berate my children people all the time. Though I pride myself on being an optimistic person, I simply can’t stomach wishy-washy, stupid people. Here’s a thought, think about what you want to say before opening your mouth. Please, do us all a favor. Seriously.

9. Beverage – I absolutely, positively MUST have coffee every day – sometimes twice a day. There’s really no justifying this weakness nor trying to explain why; I simply must make it so.

10. Business – For the past two years, I’ve designed and maintained websites for six area schools, three restaurants, one financial company and have narrated classes for an online school in New York. I’m currently working on offering blog templates (sometime in the next decade) and submitting some of my writing. That’s what I do – that’s what I am.

11. Baggage – I don’t have a lot of emotional baggage. True, I’ve had some pretty shocking things happen to me in the past, but I’ve been pretty successful at leaving my baggage on the carousel and dodging the occasional phone call to come pick it up. Life is too short to dwell on past mistakes – move on.

12. Bullet – I wear bulletproof vests. I bet you didn’t know that about me, did you. Even if you looked closely (and this is assuming I’d allow you to get close enough to try), you wouldn’t see it. I’ve bulletproofed my heart and there is simply no way anything, or anybody, can puncture it. Okay, that’s not entirely true – there are ways, but they aren’t obvious so I’m not worried about anyone trying. How’s that for vague?

13. Blogger – I’ve become a full-time blogger. At least, I feel like a full-time blogger. I spend an unhealthy amount of time online and I’m not ashamed to admit it (okay, maybe I’m a tad ashamed). I adore blogging and I adore quite a few bloggers. I feel like I’m part of a community and even though I’ll most likely never, ever meet 98% of the people I’ve “talked” to online, I consider them friends. Blogging is better than drugs – not that I’ve ever tried drugs. *cough*